YES!!! The "I'm so happy" thread. 2009

[Anthony Darby]

Seems I can't remove this post. Has the facility gone?

[Anthony Darby]

Power to your elbow Paul.

OK Anthony.... you're going to have to explain that one.  The only thing I can come up with is that I can spend more money bending my elbow down at the pub.    Or is it the elbow-work packing shelves?    Not looking forward to that bit of it. 

It basically means 'good for you' Mark, but in a way that means go out and celebrate, which is where the bending your elbow bit comes in.

[Lesley Cox]

Not GOOD for you but good for YOU. Congrats Paul. Mark's turn next then.

[ranunculus]

This evening's Life programme on Plants was truly magnificent ... perfect television.

[Anthony Darby]

This evening's Life programme on Plants was truly magnificent ... perfect television.

Yes. I hope my biology pupils were watching it!

[art600]

Nursery Rhymes won't die out if we keep them updated.

The future of nursery rhyme
 
Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall
The structure of the wall was incorrect
So he won a grand with Claims Direct.
 

It's Raining, It's Pouring
Of course...it's Global Warming.

 
Jack and Jill went into town
To fetch some chips and sweeties.
He can't keep his heart rate down
And she's got diabetes.

. 
Mary had a little lamb
Her father shot it dead.
Now it goes to school with her
Between two chunks of bread.


 
Mary had a little lamb
It ran into a pylon.
10,000 volts went up its arse
And turned its wool to nylon.

 
Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry..
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too cause he was gay.

 
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To have a little fun..
Jill, the dill,
Forgot her pill,
And now they have a son.

 
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
And planned to do some kissing.
Jack made a pass
And grabbed her ass
Now his two front teeth are missing.

 
Mary had a little lamb
Its fleece was white and wispy.
Then it caught Foot and Mouth Disease
And now it's black and crispy.

 
 
 
 
 

[Paul T]

  Arthur!  I'm appalled!!  How wickedly non 'PC' of you. 

Got any more of them? 

One correction though..... if Georgie Porgie was kissing both the boys and the girls that would make him Bi, not Gay. 

I really love these, got a great chuckle. 

[Paul T]

Power to your elbow Paul.

OK Anthony.... you're going to have to explain that one.  The only thing I can come up with is that I can spend more money bending my elbow down at the pub.    Or is it the elbow-work packing shelves?    Not looking forward to that bit of it. 

It basically means 'good for you' Mark, but in a way that means go out and celebrate, which is where the bending your elbow bit comes in.

Thanks for the clarification, Anthony.  I hadn't come across the term before, so now I know.  At least I sort of got the elbow bending link. 

[art600]

Paul

I am terribly non-PC - I still ask for a white coffee 

[Paul T]

 

[Michael J Campbell]

Mary had a little lamb,
She also had a bear,
I often saw her little lamb,
But I never saw her bear.

Jack and Jill went up the hill,
To fetch a pale of water,
Jill came down with £20
And it wasn't for carrying water.

Georgie Porgie Pudding and Pie
Kissed the girls and made them cry..
When the boys came out to play
He kissed them too, cause he is funny that way

[Michael J Campbell]

If a female Lion is called a lioness.
What do you call a female Bear.?

[Paul T]

Gee, this topic is showing me all sorts of things I didn't know about members of this forum!!!! 

Mainly that their senses of humour are disturbingly similar to mine. 

Another good chuckle.

[ranunculus]

If a female Lion is called a lioness.
What do you call a female Bear.?

Grizzly?   

[johnw]

What do you call a female Bear.?

Ma'am.

johnw