Computer problems and/or advice 2012

[rob krejzl]

My son's like you Paul. He loves to waste their time, running the converation round in circles until they get fed up. Me, I just tell them thank you and then hang up.

[ranunculus]

I just put them on to my two year old grandson ... he loves it!   

[Anthony Darby]

Thanks guys. That puts my mind at rest. I wonder if next doors have a two year old grandson I can borrow?

[Paul T]

Rob,

I only do that sometimes.... it depends what mood I'm in.  Usually it is fairly short and sharp from my end.  I haven't actually said "hang on a minute, I just need to finish something, I'll be back in a moment" and put the phone down on the table and left them to it.  I wonder how long they'd hold on for before giving up?

So Cliff, do they actually talk to your grandson, or just hang up?

[ranunculus]

Rob,

So Cliff, do they actually talk to your grandson, or just hang up?

He usually signs them up for his nursery!!   

[angie]

I have had a few calls saying that I could be having problems with my windows system and this could be very serious, the first time I panicked and then said I have a mac. The line just went dead. I hate having all these calls.

Years ago when there wasn't a day went past without getting a call from a double glazing company my brother in law got so fed up and agreed to have an appointment to get a quote for a conservatory. The company wasn't happy when they arrived at my brother in laws address. He never told them he was in a top floor flat ( four floors up ) they got really annoyed saying he wasted their time. He replied now you know how I feel.

Angie 

[mark smyth]

Good on him Angie.

As for cold calling religous people I love telling them about pagan rituals

[Paul T]

Just remember, Mark.  If you want to go for authentic pagan-ritual-wise.... you can't include devil worship.  No such thing as a devil in the pagan faiths.  The devil is a purely christian invention, despite the fact that so many pagans end up termed "devil worshippers".    I always find it amusing when I hear that...... because it is the direct opposite.

I just thought I'd mention that, in case you were accidentally leading those poor christian door knockers astray.  

[Susan]

Try one or more of these: (Only if you're bored of course)

Fun Things To Do To Telemarketers

    * If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located, how long it has been in business, how many people work there, how they got into this line of work, if they are married, how many kids they have, etc. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.
    * Say "no" over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.
    * If a Telco  calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as sinister a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends, would you be my friend?"
    * If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems. My arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog has the gout..."
    * If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out goat blood? How about human blood?"
    * Tell the telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her home phone number so you can call him/her back. When the telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their home numbers say, "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The telemarketer will agree and you say, "Me either!" Hang up.
    * Ask them to repeat everything they say several times.
    * Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke. "Come on, Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your momma?"
    * Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speak up... louder... louder...
When the salesperson asks, "Is this the homeowner?" say, "Is this the salesperson?" and when they say, "Yes," hang up.

[Anthony Darby]

Brilliant.

[Paul T]

Not a computer "problem", but.....

Has the forum formatting changed for anyone else?  I'm finding the font is a little larger, proportions are a little different, today when I've logged in?  I think I noticed it late last night as well, but thought it was my imagination.  No other sites I am visiting have this effect, so it must be something within the forum interacting with my computer?  Slightly offputting, as I feel that everything is just a bit bigger and not as neat and tidy.  No one else having this?

[Maggi Young]

That's odd, Paul. Might you have managed to hit the control button while scrolling on a page? That would explain a change. Do that myself from time to time to give my eyes a rest.

[Paul T]

So how do I change it back?  Whatever it is, it's now like this for everything here on the forum?

[Maggi Young]

left mouse click on a page and hold the control button down, while scrolling the mouse wheel towards you.

Away from you makes the page, text etc  larger, and towards you makes it smaller.   Adjust to suit.

[Paul T]

Bingo!!  We're back.    That was easy.

You learn something new every day.  Thanks so much.