Scottish Rock Garden Club Forum
General Subjects => General Forum => Topic started by: shelagh on January 09, 2008, 04:50:42 PM
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There may be a spot on the website already for these but I haven't noticed it. I was going through my holdiay snaps from Prague taken last September and found one I had forgotten. It made me laugh :D I hope it does the same for you.
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Odd really! So is mine and I thought I was unique ;D As my old Granddad used to say 'You know what thought did, he followed a muck cart and thought it was a wedding'. Very profound was my Granddad.
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Here's one I saw in Trinidad offering parking for visitors to a spectacular waterfall.
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Shelagh,
Now look what you have started.
Paddy
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Yes, It's not only Cliff Booker who has a peculiar sense of humour.
Paddy
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Hilarious! Reminds me of the ready made foods you can buy which state : 'Product may be hot when heated' ::) ??? :o
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Last few. Any more and I would be ashamed to show my face again on this forum.
Paddy
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On the Norwich bypass is one which always makes me smile, but as I am driving cannot take a photo!
"For the Broads follow Great Yarmouth"
Do they know something I don't?
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Brian, that is obviously a sign explaining that the Great Yarmouth football team has a fine set of Cheerleaders... ;)
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packets of nuts say "may contain nuts!"
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Mark,
Which is always a concern..... if it is only a "may". What do the rest of the packets contain? :o
Great signs everyone. I particularly like the "Whale watching is not an emergency" sign.
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Not signs exactly but on a similar theme...... both captured in the Dolomites.
Could be titled.....
'Ready-Mixed concrete - Delivered to your Doorstep - No amount too small or too large'
'Genetically modified orchids are becoming established in northern Italy'
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Paddy, do I assume you collect photographs of odd signs? ::) :P :-[
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Alas they modified the sign at the Keir roundabout a mile out of Dunblane which said "Cathedral" and then below "services".
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Cliff,
I knew you could not be far behind!
David,
I took these from the internet - to add interest to reading lessons for the kids at school.
Paddy
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One seen just yesterday:
"Construction vehicle: Don't Follow"
...how they expected anyone to see it if you WEREN'T following them, I don't know.
There's a photograph of another favorite on my web site--you'll have to hunt for it!
Finally, one that I must go back to photograph:
"Weed Orchard--Pick Your Own"
I was so intrigued I went to the place. It turns out there is a family with the surname Weed that raises apples!
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What a wonderful crop. Paddy the sotp sign could have been written by one of my past pupils, in fact many of them. Glad to know they are employed or were!
It's good to see some mid-winter madness, makes up for the dull day outside.
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This isn't crazy but it works in any language. I can't believe I'm the only person on this forum who knows exactly where this is.
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Martin,
Certain local Irish pronunciations could continue your sign as follows: Damen...Dawomen
Paddy
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Walking at Mt. Rainier National Park near Seattle in the early 1990s, I was amused by the following sign, a valiant attempt to attract attention to the large problems with erosion (unfortunately my picture is on a slide):
DO NOT TREAD, MOSEY, HOP, TRAMPLE, STEP, PLOD, TIP-TOE, TROT, TRAIPSE, MEANDER, CREEP, PRANCE, AMBLE, JOG, TRUDGE, MARCH, STOMP, TODDLE, JUMP, STUMBLE, TREAD, SPRINT, OR WALK ON THE PLANTS........
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...they forgot HIRPLE...
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Carlo, how do you know "HIRPLE"? ??? I had no idea you spoke Scots ! ::) Wonderful word, isn't it ?
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It's been one of my favorite words for many years. I don't remember when I first came across it, but the picture it creates in the mind is unforgettable...I've used it on many occasions...
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Not a crazy sign maybe, but I saw this old Mr. Bulb on a roundabout in our village.
Maybe a sign of spring? ;)
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"Weed Orchard--Pick Your Own"
I was so intrigued I went to the place. It turns out there is a family with the surname Weed that raises apples!
As in Calochortus weedii?
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As in Calochortus weedii?
Sounds like one to avoid? ::)
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As in Calochortus weedii?
Sounds like one to avoid? ::)
On the contrary. A lovely golden yellow, lightly speckled with brown. Mariposa type, not so tall and lanky as many others. I uses to have it and it seeded reliably too but I haven't seen it around for years.
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...they forgot HIRPLE...
Perhaps one is ALLOWED to hirple :)
I think it's what the hunchback of Notre Dame did, in the Gina Lollobrigida film version of the book. I had to Google to be sure of the spelling of that wondrous lady's name. She is now 80 years old and apparently still going strong.
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"Hirpling" is what I'm doing since I pulled a quad muscle helping the BD lift our new double electric oven into the house from the car on Friday. Ouch! Blasted thing was wrapped in a slippery plastic and as I struggled to grab it as it slid out of hands, the leg "went".....that caused the oven to twist so I have a sore arm on the other side... BD is fine, you'll be pleased to hear... and oven is now installed, though reluctant to stop giving off 'orrible fumes, in spite of several hours of running the damn thing, as per instruction book. AND our gas heating is busted so very cold.... if we had a sign outside this crazy house it would read "Abandon hope all ye who enter here"
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Maggi you'll just have to keep turning on that 5000 watt smile you have. ???
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Oh, I'd say there were no smiles but plenty of heat in the kitchen!
Paddy
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A friend visited America and took this pic! :o
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That one I REALLY like!
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I've only just seen this thread! This is a favorite, in Portuguese.
"FLYING STONES
HOOT!"
it says, and you read as you are driving past.
Only when you study the sign at leisure do you realise that the little figure has a strimmer to cut the grass along the road, which may lead to flying stones. Therefore please hoot so they realise you are approaching and can stop strimming! ;D ;D
Chloë
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Was looking for stick insects on ebay and found this in the description for one:
"They are sold here as food for the Saharan Five Legged Stick Insect Eating Sparrow Hawk in order to comply with ebay rules. I always thought that was a good rule, everyone means it when they sell spiders and £20 leaf Insects and Preying[sic] Mantis as food. I spend £2500 per week buying various ornamental spiders, cockroaches and stick insects to feed my hamster. So I should know that these stick insects make a lovely deep fried snack. Thanks for reading.
These stick insects will be sent out by Royal Mail Special Delivery, by 1pm next day, post so they'll be nice and fresh when you feed them to your pet."
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Goodness me, Anthony, and to think I thought WE gardeners were inclined to be a little strange :P
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Anthony,
Oh I just LOVE that one. I've been giggling myself silly (well perhaps that should be sillier than usual) since I read it a few minutes ago. Had to take some time to recover so I could write this. So you aren't allowed to sell pets via ebay I am guessing, but you can sell live food for pets? I just LOVE the way it is written.
Also, nice to them to apologise for George Dubbya..... if only it was that easy!! ::)
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Couldn't resist sharing this roadside sign from Sikkim which was on a slide shown by East Lancs Group member Ronnie Price on Monday night.
Ronnie is a great character and, with Hilary his missus, takes great plants to AGS shows. His talks are always very amusing as the sign will testify.
I am sure lady members will appreciate the sentiment! ;D
John
DONT GOSSIP.
LET HIM DRIVE.
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This brought back memories of some similar posts ... perhaps in the Old Forum..... and I found this image, which took my attention at that time and I saved it......
[attach=1]
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As I fall into the river I can imagine myself complimenting Health & Safety, PC etc, for ensuring that my fingers were intact. ;) 8) ;)
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This brought back memories of some similar posts ... perhaps in the Old Forum..... and I found this image, which took my attention at that time and I saved it......
(Attachment Link)
Here it is Maggi:
http://www.srgc.org.uk/smf/index.php?topic=1170.0 (http://www.srgc.org.uk/smf/index.php?topic=1170.0)
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Thank you, Luit! Yes, there are some funny ones there!
I think I will merge these topics. 8)
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Can't remember if I ever showed you this sign....but beware of a Lancastrian with camera !!!!!!
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The bag of Lemon Chilli dusted Cashews I was eating yesterday said "This product comes from a factory that produces nut products"!
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Mark,
Well you can't accuse them of not telling the truth, now can you? :P
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Ah well, each to his own! Lemon chilli dusted cashews indeed. Personally I'd rather eat a poorly monkey as the saying goes. ::)
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Ah well, each to his own! Lemon chilli dusted cashews indeed. Personally I'd rather eat a poorly monkey as the saying goes. ::)
Cooked on a 'griller', David?
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Ah Cliff, what a chimpion comment!! ;)
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I seem to remember an amusing 'Danger, Cliff Face' sign on the old forum.
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I seem to remember an amusing 'Danger, Cliff Face' sign on the old forum.
Under my avatar, Anthony? :)
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Here's one I took on South Island when on my way to Picton.
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So there is the VAT tax, would that be the FLAT tax?
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From Tom's sign they seem to have an odd way of spelling flatulence in New Zealand
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From Tom's sign they seem to have an odd way of spelling flatulence in New Zealand
Yes, but I think it sounds the same ::)
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I see flatu-incense
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;D ;D
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Mark,
That's a concern.... have you seen an optometrist? :P
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two years since I had my eyes done. How's the 'tash? You do realise when you take it off you'll be left with a white mark on your face in the shape of your moustache
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Mark,
The Tash went on the evening of the first of December, believe me. Hated it with a passion. :o
Was a little white on the lip at the time, but didn't last for long given I work outside.
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From Tom's sign they seem to have an odd way of spelling flatulence in New Zealand
You deserve a pat on the back for spotting that David. ;D
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I think the sign Tom saw refers to what we jocularly called the FART tax, when the govt wished to impose a tax on cows (i.e. the farmers who kept cows) in recognition that our cattle population almost certainly was emitting more bad gasses ( ;D) than other sources such as cars, and in order to keep faith with our agreements under the Kyoto protocols. Obviously the sign writer didn't think much of it. The FART tax was abandoned after a time, as much because it made the govt look so damned silly as for any other reason. The new govt is talking about re-introducing it as a possibility. But that's all right - they already look damned silly, after just a month in office.
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I'm never quite sure what I have to do when I see the sign "Beware, low flying aircraft" - take my hat off?
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Don't take offense, but it looks as you you did and had a really close encounter! ;D
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Just to lower the tone even more, here are some suitable for schoolboys. I have left out the ruder ones !!
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:o
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Someone from Czech Republic needs to translate this. It is funny but I cant remember exactly how it goes
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Not exactly a sign - more of a saying that some forumists might appreciate... ::) ::) ::)
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Just like a well balanced Scotsman - a chip on each shoulder. ;D [With a bit of luck I'll get transported to Botany Bay for that. ::)]
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Most people eat their chips, not balance them on their shoulders like some kind of epaulettes. :)
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Does that mean I've had mine Lesley?
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'Fraid so Anthony. Don't know what you'll find in Botany Bay nowadays. Probably posh houses costing millions. 8)
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Did you know that the Queen was partial to a Chinese Take-Away when staying at her Balmoral holiday home? For the benefit of our foreign viewers, the senior members of the Royal Family grant Royal Warrants to businesses they regularly patronise. These businesses are allowed to display these warrants on their premises, letter heads etc.
[attachthumb=1]
Maureen & Brian Wilson, Aberdeen
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My red sign up above says
Attention
This property is guarded by dog.
In a case you will meet him
lie down on earth and wait for help.
If no help will come, good luck.
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Did you know that the Queen was partial to a Chinese Take-Away when staying at her Balmoral holiday home? For the benefit of our foreign viewers, the senior members of the Royal Family grant Royal Warrants to businesses they regularly patronise. These businesses are allowed to display these warrants on their premises, letter heads etc.
Is there a Kebab shop with a Royal Warrant from the Duke of Edinburgh ? ::) ;)
( There goes any chance I had of being made Dame Margaret :-[ :-X )
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A couple of tripe shops in Lancashire ... ? :)
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A couple of tripe shops in Lancashire ... ? :)
Do tripe shops still exist? :o
And what do they have on their shop fronts..... "Shop here for a load of tripe" :P
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First one on Google, Maggi, but I am certain there are still one or two on this side of the Pennines ...
http://www.leedsmarket.com/thetripeshop.htm
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I have just spotted this on the above link ...
Quality tripe can increase your libedo four fold.
It obviously doesn't improve one's spelling ... :)
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Four times nothing is still nothing Cliff. :(
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Four times nothing is still nothing Cliff. :(
Oh, dear.... that is true, but not relevant, I trust!!
[attach=1]
Cliff, I have actually seen THAT tripe shop, many moons ago when visiting Ian's Grandparents in Leeds..... cannot vouch for their tripe but the Kikgate Market in general used to be a wonderful place full of great stalls/shops.... we were amazed at the cheap prices of the fresh food, fruit and flowers, as compared to Aberdeen.... wonder what it's like now?
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Do people still eat tripe ? I can remember in the 1940's, it was dished out once a week by my mother, as it was one of the few items of food not on ration.
Hungry as I was, I could not eat it, as my sister said it was boiled nappies ! I don't think I have eaten it to this day.
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Tripe was a regular part of the diet when I was young, usually in a white sauce, a milk and onion concoction. Other now not eaten delicasies which we enjoyed were crubeens (pig's trotters to you?), pig's head, stuffed heart, liver. My mother made an excellent black pudding.
Paddy
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My auntie had two chemists shops in Leeds. My Dad used to travel from Huddersfield to Leeds University during the war. As he was in the home Guard he had a rifle. When he got there he put it is his locker (unlocked) on the Monday morning, collected it on Friday to go back home and guarded an empty factory on Saturday nights.
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Mark's sign translation reminds me of a wonderful story told at the "Alpines '81" Conference (on a tour bus as I remember), by a charming American gentleman whose name I don't recall, (Howard something. Carlo will know,) and in a heavy, German accent.
It concerned a Lufthansa flight into New York I think. For some reason the flight was going to crash over the water. The pilot issued instructions to passengers in first class, including that there were lifeboats aboard for their use and "thank you for flying Lufthansa." Economy had simlar instructions but the facilities for their use were not quite so sophistocated "and thank you for flying Lufthansa." Those paying for the least desirable seats were told to slide down the exit shutes into the water and swim for their lives "and thank you for flying Lufthansa. Those who can't swim, thank you for flying Lufthansa."
No doubt it loses a great deal in the retelling but at the time it was screamingly funny. Perhaps I should apologise to all our German Forumists because I understand their national airline is an excellent one.
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Mark's sign translation reminds me of a wonderful story told at the "Alpines '81" Conference (on a tour bus as I remember), by a charming American gentleman whose name I don't recall, (Howard something. Carlo will know,) and in a heavy, German accent.
That would be Howard Pfeifer, Lesley ... a lovely chap and an excellent lecturer.
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Tripe was a regular part of the diet when I was young, usually in a white sauce, a milk and onion concoction. Other now not eaten delicasies which we enjoyed were crubeens (pig's trotters to you?), pig's head, stuffed heart, liver. My mother made an excellent black pudding.
Paddy
This Forum is an endless source of information - now I know what to avoid in 4 languages - tripe, tripes (French) - callos (Spanish) - Kutteln (German). ;D Long ago I got a soup with this delicacy in Skopje (Macedonia) but unfortunalely forgot the word for it. ???
Gerd
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Patsas, Gerd?
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Should that be patsinnereds Cliff? ::)
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Patsas, Gerd?
??? ??? ??? Sorry, it was more than 20 years ago. Only remember the unique
feeling when chewing it :-X
Gerd
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Tripe was a regular part of the diet when I was young, usually in a white sauce, a milk and onion concoction. Other now not eaten delicasies which we enjoyed were crubeens (pig's trotters to you?), pig's head, stuffed heart, liver. My mother made an excellent black pudding.
Paddy
We used to fed our big dog (Hovawart) almost every day with (unwashed) tripe.
Travelling years ago in Switzerland we came late in the evening into a very good restaurant.
We were asked if we wanted something to eat, so we replied that we would like to eat some small portion.
They advised something we did not know, but we tried.
Half way the waitress asked if we liked it and we did, but asked what it was.
When she told us, we both were thinking how our dog always was dispatching his meal and the noise he made.
You will understand we were not so hungry anymore.. :-\ ::)
We were happy that we ordered a good bottle of wine to our meal :D ;D
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Should that be patsinnereds Cliff? ::)
I knew you would get to the bottom of it, Anthony! :)
You have got it off Pat.
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My dad used to swear by tripe and onions cooked in milk whenever he had a cold, and the smell of cooking tripe and onions is one of my childhood memories from my grandma's house. I couldn't eat it though not even if someone else paid! ;D
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I couldn't eat it though not even if someone else paid! ;D
Which says it all David.. ::) ;D ;D
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Have you seen the sign Mark put up under the thread 'Plants from my garden'? It has been translated kindly and is very funny. Will give you a morning chuckle.
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Referring back to Lesley's Lufthansa flight story: A story is told of an Aer Lingus(Irish carrier) trans-Atlantic flight where the captain announced that one engine had failed and the arrival in New York would be delayed by half an hour. Some time later he reported another engine failure with a consequent delay of one hour arriving in New York. When the third engine failed he explained that arrival time would be two hours late. At this stage one Irish passenger turned to the other and said, "Feck it, If the last engine fails, we'll be up here the whole night."
Paddy
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I have just heard that the pet food giant 'Pedigree Chum' is going into liquidation. They have had to send in the retrievers.
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I have just heard that the pet food giant 'Pedigree Chum' is going into liquidation. They have had to send in the retrievers.
You could see the pointers ...
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Although the dalmations couldn't spot them ...
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Thanks for Pfeifer Cliff. I remember well - now. I did, in fact have Michelle in my mind but was connecting that with an Australian friend of that name who'd phoned the night before.
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Did you know that the Queen was partial to a Chinese Take-Away when staying at her Balmoral holiday home?
We should come clean on this one. At first sight, it really looked as though the warrant belonged to the take-away, but it was actually an 'over-spill' from the shop next door (baker? - can't remember) who did not have enough room to display all their royal warrants on their own shop frontage. Don't think Her Maj would be seen queueing for a take-away!!
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One may have a won ton :o
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Did you know that the Queen was partial to a Chinese Take-Away when staying at her Balmoral holiday home?
We should come clean on this one. At first sight, it really looked as though the warrant belonged to the take-away, but it was actually an 'over-spill' from the shop next door (baker? - can't remember) who did not have enough room to display all their royal warrants on their own shop frontage. Don't think Her Maj would be seen queueing for a take-away!!
Well, I would think she would order a home delivery, Brian, surely? It could come with the buns.....
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Just to remind folks there is now a new thread on this subject:
http://www.srgc.org.uk/smf/index.php?topic=5773.0 8)
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Someone from Czech Republic needs to translate this. It is funny but I cant remember exactly how it goes
Here's the translation you asked for:
CAUTION
Property guarded by dog
In case of encounter, lie down and wait for help.
If nobody arrives: good luck.
T.